[ssf] Reintroduction of Þorn in to Common English Usage

[adam]

Did you know that Iceland, that little volcanic island of the north,
got rid of the letter z from its alphabet in 1973? Who could expect
anything less, some would say, from the nation that single handedly
terrorised both hardworking holidaymakers and the international
community in April of last year, by bringing air traffic to a
virtual world wide stand still?

Others, such as myself perhaps, wouldn't take either the loss of a
letter, or the de facto reduction in the fossil fuel burning footprint
of a few individuals, as necessarily such a bad thing, nor even link
the two topics together in one's head. But if you like me have a firm
believe, that words are of little use if you don't even know how to
sigh or whistle, then, this loss of a letter, should seem like a good
start, if not as a general drive against the extinction of words
themselves, then to at least a reduction in their number.

However, upon a cursory inspection of the alphabet in question, i read
that i was confused, for not only does Iceland have the vast majority
of the usual roman characters endemic in european alphabets, but they
have a few more also -- there was me hoping for some kind of a alphabet
-lite i guess, a thinned down version, 8 or 9 characters max, but no, a
whopping gret 32 in total.  And this one, near the end, sticking out a
like a sore thumb, foreign but strangely familiar, the little runic
character þ, that is pronounced th and goes by the name of thorn. [1]

Hmmm, i came across it recently in a library book about place names in
the north of england; it begins an old spelling of the suffix -thorp,
that is -þorp, as in scunþorp. In the book i was reading, a þorp was
said to be first a clearing upon a hill, a vantage point in the forest,
a small settlement, visible, with tracks leading out from þorp through
thick woodland to neighbouring þorp. I like woods, i used to play in
them when i was a kid. And as i looked at the letter þ and said the
sound th out loud, i kinda got it, how the circle could be one's
tongue, or the tip of one's tongue in motion, describing out the
circle of the þ as it moved, extruding from the vertical line of
one's face lips or teeth, th, þ, and i thought, well, i can do that,
or raþer þat.

But, still with no more þan a cursory inspection of þe alphabet in
question, i found þat not only had Iceland banned þe letter zed, but
presently, þat little nation was claiming sole use of þe letter þorn,
all for its own self, and it's written, in black and wiki, þat þey got
þe letter from over here in þe first place -- it's ye olde english --
copied down in a script called þe first grammatical treatise, by a
plagiarist or plagiarists unknown [2]

At þis point, i must admit, i got raþer churchillian about it, but
þought not only of þe english speaking peoples, þis common bond, þat
spans both minds and continents, but also of Japan, þose industrious
islands south of þe equator, and poor old mester suzuki, and what he
would þink to all of þis, and his fellow country men, and germany for
þat matter, and þeir motor-bikers, for how would þey address him, in
þis modern world of communications, þus deprived of þe letter zed? [3]

Iceland, i say þis to you, surely þere must be some kind of compromise
-- please let us use, þe letterz we use in any case, if not from a
freedom of expression point of view, þen in an attempt to save þe
planet. Consider þis web page, þe only one i've been able to find so
far transcribed in þenglish:

	http://dev.ecodissident.net/immi-þorn

A relatively short read in itself, þis document uses þ raþer þan þe
th digraph, a little over one hundred times, in about ten times as may
words. Þink of þe energy savings if þis letter was released tout le
monde, and not just þe energy savings to folks fingers with þeir new
efficient one stroke raþer þan two stroke spelling, but to þe
electricity grids of every nation, who would no longer be burdened
in carrying þis lumbering double sized wannabe.

Iceland, wake up! Where is your conscience!

--
Below þe belt marketing ::
Brought to you by your friendly neighbourhood cooperative ::
"it's still early morning, we could go down to þe harbour
  and jump between þe boats, and see þe sun come round" -- björk

Footnotes
---------
[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/þ
[2] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icelandic_alphabet
[3] But þen, þere is no þorn is dussledorf, þe're like sheffielders dere
arn't da, dey dun't need no þs in deir -dorfs, þat's -þorps to me and þee